Hey everyone. Don't you just love short work weeks! I know I do. For those of you not fortunate enough to get Good Friday off, may I just say, MUHAHAHAHA! Kidding. Sorry for ya! But I do get the day off & plan to get a little rest after running some errands for the biz & getting my grill drilled! My teeth are JACKED up! Anywho. Let's get on with this.
So as I said, it's a short week for me. I am currently in school working on that ever elusive degree & taking 3 classes this semester. This is Spring break so I am able to get home by 6! It feels weird being home so early watching TV. But it's cool cuz I get to hang with my boys longer. I also got to take them to their Taekwondo class without rushing. GASP! So as my kids were training, I got into a lengthy conversation with 1 of the dads there. His son is one of the older kids & ours started around the same time. His son should be about an advanced red belt by now since he started as a white belt while my kids spent the 1st 6 months in the tiny tiger program. Well now he is only 1 level ahead of them as an advanced blue belt while my sons are both blue belts.
The kids dad was obviously upset by this, but admitted it was his fault because he had no faith in his son & purposely asked to hold him back due to his son misbehaving at home & school. Now he sees younger kids like mine, passsing him by. I sat there listing to this man talk about his son with such disgust. He said his son was bad at school, bad at TKD & bad at home. Never listens & so on. It was very annoying. I mean we all want whats best for our kids & I know at times I can be kinda hard on my boys trying to get them to always try their best but I would never ever speak about my sons with such disapproval. This guy spoke highly of his daughters, but made his son sound like left overs. I watched as his son looked back to see if his dad was watching & his dad would bark orders at him. Then the kid would just start acting up. Playing around & stuff. As an older child he sets the tone for how the younger kids will try to act.
So of course my son started acting out. But after listing to this other father, I immediately changed up. I wasn't going to yell at my sons the way this guy did. I don't want to be that parent. I don't want my kids to think I am not proud of them. The stuff I put them through is not easy. I know this. If it was, every kid would do it. We practice at home. Reading, writing, math, TKD & just everyday behavior. I try to teach them to take pride in what they do & not get into bad habits. Then we go out & people give me & their mom all of these kudos. The man I spoke to praised me for being able to handle both of them as well as I do & admitted he was at the end of his rope with his son. It was sad. I can only imagine what that kid is going through. My dad wasn't there, so I never had that disapproving father. I try not to do that to my sons, but maybe me being so hard on them or pushing them to be their best makes them feel that way. I really hope not. If so I have to really re-evaluate how I approach being a father. I always speak highly of my kids to people. I tell the good & bad, but I don't call my child dumb or slow. I don't demean them.
So the dad asked me for some tips. Keep in mind this is an older man, with older children who falls into the majority category. So the fact that he asked me for fatherly advice honestly made me feel validated as a parent. That maybe I am doing some things right. So I told him that the last thing I want to do is scar my kids. I try positive reinforcement. Even when they act up or I have to discipline them, I let em know that I am doing it out of love. That I only care about them being ok when I am not around. I want them to understand that in life, nothing is given. So the fact that I am putting them on this path to learn to succeed at an early age, shouldn't be taken for granted. I don't sugar coat things with them. The world is not covered in marshmallows & lollipops. It's ugly & the few out their with happy lives had to work for that life.
My kids understand hard work. They also understand the rewards of doing their best. They are accomplishing things at 6 & 7 that I haven't even done at 35. So I am 100% proud of them. He said I was right & maybe he expected too much from his son & would loosen up a bit. I told him not to expect less, just don't be so hard on him when he makes a mistake. Don't get me wrong, I bark orders at my kids. When they make a mistake or act bratty I let them know. I'm not going to love them any less or give up on them. So when he says he's fed up or tired of trying, his sons can feel that. I also told him that I pick my battles with my kids. I don't have the energy to make every little thing they do a big deal. So getting upset with them for not doing as well in 1 thing as they do in another, is pointless to me. I try to help them get better in their weak areas, but I understand that maybe that is not their talent. My sons love taekwondo, but they don't really have a talent for it. So I'm not going to explode because they struggle with the newer moves. My kids aren't the athletic types where it all comes easy to them, but they try their best, thats all I ask.
So to the father I spoke with, I hope you figure it all out & you can look past you son's faults & figure out how to make life better at home & school for him otherwise your son will grow up resenting you & scarred.
Until next time
D
Thursday, April 21, 2011
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Birthdays!!!
Happy Tuesday folks. My blogging has been at a minimum lately. Not that I don't have a million stories, a million funny things to discuss about my goofy sons & our misadventures, but life is in a rush these days. Luckily spring break is coming next week so I won't have to think about school for a few days. Anywho lets move....
So as you all know by now, I have started a new company called Jump Jumpz. I rent out Jumpers & cotton candy machines for kids birthday parties. It's a lot of fun, not too much work, but work none the less. I get to meet all of these different families & be apart of providing a bday memory for kids. I loved bday parties as a kid. My mom gathering everyone around, bbq & GIFTS! All of us kids running around with our friends, it was always a good time. But I never got to have that real big party. With jumpers, pony's & cotton candy. I never had that experience to have the biggest bday party of the year that was talked about for years. Well thats what motivates me to give my kids the best bdays I can. I want them to remember it & talk about it years later.
Part of the issue when I was a kid was timing. My birthday is June 20th, so most of the kids had already left for Summer vacation. I couldn't talk to any of my friends from school because school was out. So yea, it sucked! Now on to my kids. I go above & beyond for their bdays, usually doing too much. Like last years faled attempt for the whole fam & a few friends to get together for Daevon's 7th bday at Great America, or a couple years ago when we tried to have Isaiah's 4th party with 60 invites at Chucky Cheese (GHETTOOOOOO) & lets not forget an oldie but goodie, Daevon's 3rd bday where I caught on fire & was told to stop drop & roll by my then 9 year old kinda neice Chin....good times...NOT! Woo sah. Moving on.
So I started Jump Jumpz in honor of that. Giving kids a birthday bash is a lot easier now. There are so many places to have a party. The problem is, cost. That crap is expensive! We spend at least 1000 a year on both of our son's parties. $1000! We have 2 kids. So we are spending 500 for each child, just to eat cake & ice cream & play with their friends at places like Chuck E Cheese, Bounce A Rama, The Jungle or Pump It Up. It's insane! That doesn't even count what we spend on cakes, food & gifts! So Jump Jumpz was a brainchild for families to give their kids the best party ever at a reasonable price. I will NEVER charge a family an arm & a leg just so their children can have the birthday party of their dreams. That's my goal. To be the Walmart of birthday party places.
We celebrated Isaiah's birthday party at Bounce A Rama in the Great Mall in Milpitas. It wasn't too expensive, but we could only have a small number of kids there. 8 in total! What kind of experience is that for $300 bucks? So after that, my oldest son/future business partner Daevon said he wanted a big Jump Jumpz party at a park so we can invite EVERYONE we know so they can have fun on our jumpers & want to use them for their parties. The kid is a GENIUS! I swear! He says he wants to invite so many people so we can give out all of our cards & get a lot of money this Summer. Ahh man, this kid is gonna muscle me outta my business when he's 10! So we will have a great bday party for Daevon, & open the invite list up for anyone we know who wants to come enjoy time with our family & test out the Jump Jumpz equipment for their future events. Mark May 7th on your calenders folks, details coming next week :)
Until Next time
DJ
So as you all know by now, I have started a new company called Jump Jumpz. I rent out Jumpers & cotton candy machines for kids birthday parties. It's a lot of fun, not too much work, but work none the less. I get to meet all of these different families & be apart of providing a bday memory for kids. I loved bday parties as a kid. My mom gathering everyone around, bbq & GIFTS! All of us kids running around with our friends, it was always a good time. But I never got to have that real big party. With jumpers, pony's & cotton candy. I never had that experience to have the biggest bday party of the year that was talked about for years. Well thats what motivates me to give my kids the best bdays I can. I want them to remember it & talk about it years later.
Part of the issue when I was a kid was timing. My birthday is June 20th, so most of the kids had already left for Summer vacation. I couldn't talk to any of my friends from school because school was out. So yea, it sucked! Now on to my kids. I go above & beyond for their bdays, usually doing too much. Like last years faled attempt for the whole fam & a few friends to get together for Daevon's 7th bday at Great America, or a couple years ago when we tried to have Isaiah's 4th party with 60 invites at Chucky Cheese (GHETTOOOOOO) & lets not forget an oldie but goodie, Daevon's 3rd bday where I caught on fire & was told to stop drop & roll by my then 9 year old kinda neice Chin....good times...NOT! Woo sah. Moving on.
So I started Jump Jumpz in honor of that. Giving kids a birthday bash is a lot easier now. There are so many places to have a party. The problem is, cost. That crap is expensive! We spend at least 1000 a year on both of our son's parties. $1000! We have 2 kids. So we are spending 500 for each child, just to eat cake & ice cream & play with their friends at places like Chuck E Cheese, Bounce A Rama, The Jungle or Pump It Up. It's insane! That doesn't even count what we spend on cakes, food & gifts! So Jump Jumpz was a brainchild for families to give their kids the best party ever at a reasonable price. I will NEVER charge a family an arm & a leg just so their children can have the birthday party of their dreams. That's my goal. To be the Walmart of birthday party places.
We celebrated Isaiah's birthday party at Bounce A Rama in the Great Mall in Milpitas. It wasn't too expensive, but we could only have a small number of kids there. 8 in total! What kind of experience is that for $300 bucks? So after that, my oldest son/future business partner Daevon said he wanted a big Jump Jumpz party at a park so we can invite EVERYONE we know so they can have fun on our jumpers & want to use them for their parties. The kid is a GENIUS! I swear! He says he wants to invite so many people so we can give out all of our cards & get a lot of money this Summer. Ahh man, this kid is gonna muscle me outta my business when he's 10! So we will have a great bday party for Daevon, & open the invite list up for anyone we know who wants to come enjoy time with our family & test out the Jump Jumpz equipment for their future events. Mark May 7th on your calenders folks, details coming next week :)
Until Next time
DJ
Thursday, April 7, 2011
Supporting their interests
Hey folks, long time no speak! I've had a busy couple of weeks with school, the kids & the Jumper biz...well its been more like the cotton candy biz since mother nature has kept my customers from utilizing my jumpers! Damn rainy weather is bad for business! Eh well, things are looking bright for the spring & summer with people booking months in advance now.
So lets go. When I was a kid, I was into so many things. I loved to play basketball, I loved to draw, I loved to dance, act, sing, rap, tell jokes, play drums, piano so on & so forth. I am pretty sure that's why my mom never really pushed me in 1 particular area. She just accepted that I liked to do a lot of things. She went to all of my plays & talent shows. She signed me up for football & basketball, she even bought me an art table & casio keyboard. She was very supportive but never pushy. I want to be supportive as well & think I tend to push too much. My kids are only 6 & 7 right now. When I was 6 & 7 I didn't really do anything except maybe play toys & watch cartoons so it's hard for me to use myself as the measuring stick. I didn't really get into anything until I was 11. My sons are both already showing signs of excelling at things. They are both blue belts in taekwondo & will hopefully be black belts in the next 2 years. Do the math...go ahead, I'll wait. Yes they will be 8 & 9 by the time they are black belts. That's exciting to me. So I am very supportive but trying not to be pushy.
Now they want to do other things. I did a similar blog where I said I didn't want to be the Joe Jackson type, but thinking about things now, how do you not push your kids to want to be the best at something they love doing? My oldest Daevon loves to draw, sing & dance. Just like I did. He is getting better & better at drawing & even created my company logo which has gotten a lot of praise. His teachers even gush over his art work saying it's very imaginative. He has been hinting that he wants to sing too. He wants lessons but is too embarrassed to ask. I told him that if he wants to do it that I'd get him singing & piano lessons & later dance lessons. But he thinks all that is for girls. Eh well maybe when he's a little older. The boy is also very intelligent. He loves to read & write & has a fascination with dinosaurs. He can name almost every type of dinosaur & has said since he was 4 that he wants to be a paleontologist. ZUH?? All I can do is put him in position to succeed, what ever he loves to do, I want to be able to get him started & see how he excels on his own.
Isaiah is the youngest & the more physical one. The kid is freakishly strong & physically gifted. He is stronger & faster than his big brother. He is better at sports & way more aggressive in Taekwondo. Daevon memorizes the moves faster, but once Isaiah gets it, it's easier for him to kick harder & higher & faster than it is for Daevon. He wants to learn how to play basketball, which of course gets me excited since that is my favorite sport. He's also said he wants to learn boxing. I am going to bring him to a boxing gym this weekend so he can make his final decision & this summer I'll let them give basketball a try. Isaiah is also a fan of math. He hates to read, but math is easy for him. he just turned 6 & is only half way finished with his kindergarten year & he is already doing multiplication problems...for fun! He even wants to go back to teh Kumon learning center this Summer so he can learn higher grade math!
That's exciting. That both of my kids actually like to learn. They both like to get the correct answer. They are both competitive that way. They actually get upset when they are wrong & work to not be wrong again. So I know they will love to play sports & do other more competitive things. The hard part as I said is not getting them in over their little heads. As a dad its hard not to push your kids to do what we want them to do. If Daevon decides not to follow in my footsteps & pursue his artistic side & prefers the life of dinosaurs & fossils I'll support him. If Isaiah prefers numbers crunching as an account over being an MMA fighter or basketball player then I'll support them. What ever they wanna do, I just want them to want to be the best. That happens, I'm happy!
Until next time,
DJ
So lets go. When I was a kid, I was into so many things. I loved to play basketball, I loved to draw, I loved to dance, act, sing, rap, tell jokes, play drums, piano so on & so forth. I am pretty sure that's why my mom never really pushed me in 1 particular area. She just accepted that I liked to do a lot of things. She went to all of my plays & talent shows. She signed me up for football & basketball, she even bought me an art table & casio keyboard. She was very supportive but never pushy. I want to be supportive as well & think I tend to push too much. My kids are only 6 & 7 right now. When I was 6 & 7 I didn't really do anything except maybe play toys & watch cartoons so it's hard for me to use myself as the measuring stick. I didn't really get into anything until I was 11. My sons are both already showing signs of excelling at things. They are both blue belts in taekwondo & will hopefully be black belts in the next 2 years. Do the math...go ahead, I'll wait. Yes they will be 8 & 9 by the time they are black belts. That's exciting to me. So I am very supportive but trying not to be pushy.
Now they want to do other things. I did a similar blog where I said I didn't want to be the Joe Jackson type, but thinking about things now, how do you not push your kids to want to be the best at something they love doing? My oldest Daevon loves to draw, sing & dance. Just like I did. He is getting better & better at drawing & even created my company logo which has gotten a lot of praise. His teachers even gush over his art work saying it's very imaginative. He has been hinting that he wants to sing too. He wants lessons but is too embarrassed to ask. I told him that if he wants to do it that I'd get him singing & piano lessons & later dance lessons. But he thinks all that is for girls. Eh well maybe when he's a little older. The boy is also very intelligent. He loves to read & write & has a fascination with dinosaurs. He can name almost every type of dinosaur & has said since he was 4 that he wants to be a paleontologist. ZUH?? All I can do is put him in position to succeed, what ever he loves to do, I want to be able to get him started & see how he excels on his own.
Isaiah is the youngest & the more physical one. The kid is freakishly strong & physically gifted. He is stronger & faster than his big brother. He is better at sports & way more aggressive in Taekwondo. Daevon memorizes the moves faster, but once Isaiah gets it, it's easier for him to kick harder & higher & faster than it is for Daevon. He wants to learn how to play basketball, which of course gets me excited since that is my favorite sport. He's also said he wants to learn boxing. I am going to bring him to a boxing gym this weekend so he can make his final decision & this summer I'll let them give basketball a try. Isaiah is also a fan of math. He hates to read, but math is easy for him. he just turned 6 & is only half way finished with his kindergarten year & he is already doing multiplication problems...for fun! He even wants to go back to teh Kumon learning center this Summer so he can learn higher grade math!
That's exciting. That both of my kids actually like to learn. They both like to get the correct answer. They are both competitive that way. They actually get upset when they are wrong & work to not be wrong again. So I know they will love to play sports & do other more competitive things. The hard part as I said is not getting them in over their little heads. As a dad its hard not to push your kids to do what we want them to do. If Daevon decides not to follow in my footsteps & pursue his artistic side & prefers the life of dinosaurs & fossils I'll support him. If Isaiah prefers numbers crunching as an account over being an MMA fighter or basketball player then I'll support them. What ever they wanna do, I just want them to want to be the best. That happens, I'm happy!
Until next time,
DJ
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